Tag Archive for: Thanksgiving

Loneliness and Thanksgiving: Thoughts from a Catholic man

God is the answer, because without Him there is no hope

By Larry Peterson

Loneliness and the feeling of being unwanted is the most terrible poverty. (St. Teresa of Calcutta)

This will be the third Thanksgiving since my wife passed away, and when you become widowed, there is an inescapable loneliness factor that enters your life. But I have learned that loneliness has no boundaries. It reaches out for everyone and captures many of the unsuspecting, including those who are seemingly happy, contented, and successful, dragging them into a world of hidden misery and often depression.

However, many who have experienced loss manage to bounce back and find contentment, peace, and even love again. Others cannot — why is that? The common denominator seems to be that those people who have God in their lives were never alone at all. Those who do not, remain alone. The first consequence of rejecting God is the loss of hope. They have allowed hope to be erased from their spirit.

The results of losing hope are devastating. In fact, the loneliness factor in the United States has reached epidemic proportions. Here are a few statistics that show how losing hope has affected our nation. Loss of hope leads to despair, and the ones affected most by this loss are in Generation Z: those who are in the 18 to 22-year-old range. I have grandchildren older than that. The entire concept of these young people, fresh from adolescence and beginning adulthood, having lost hope is so sad. How can this be?

Cigna referenced a “Loneliness Index” which shows that loneliness has become rampant in the United States. This worldwide health services company used the UCLA Loneliness Scale  (yes, they have a loneliness scale), which is a 20-item questionnaire designed to determine a person’s social isolation and their subjective feelings. This evaluator is used frequently to track and measure loneliness. Some of the results were astonishing. This is from their report of May 1, 2018:

  • 47 percent of Americans sometimes or always feel alone
  • 27 percent of Americans feel no one understands them
  • 40 percent feel that their relationships have no meaning and feel isolated
  • 20 percent feel they feel close to no one and have no one to talk to
  • Amazingly, Generation Z (people 18 to 22) are the loneliest generation. How heartbreaking is that?
  • Social media users have a 43.5 percent loneliness factor, which was comparable to the 41.7 percent for those who do not use social media.

Isn’t it interesting that nowhere is the name of God mentioned in these findings? And nowhere is the importance of the traditional family considered. The numbers are mind-boggling. We are a nation of almost 330 million people. If 47% say they feel “alone” that is nearly half the country. We only have to go back 25 years to the early “90s to see the rapid decline in the absence of hope.

Since then, there has been a 58% decline in club meetings, a 43% drop in family dinners, and children have their playtime regulated, depriving them of natural social development. People use their phones to message each other, apply for jobs, get interviewed, quit jobs, break up with their boyfriends or girlfriends, file divorce papers, and do all sorts of interactions without having to go face to face with a person, never saying one word.

Getting back to God and family would be akin to putting the linchpin back into the hub of life. Then, people, kids included, might be taught that they can turn to Jesus and never be alone. They might be taught to think of His words:

And behold, I am with you always, until the end of this age. (Matthew 28:20)

We must count our blessings on Thanksgiving, especially knowing that more than half of all Americans still believe in and honor God in their lives and that we have the freedom to do it. This Thanksgiving, millions upon millions of us will pray together, thanking God for all we have. We should also pray for all those who do not have hope in their lives. We know it can always be reignited and prayer can be the kindling used to fire up the hope lying dormant in so many.

God is just waiting to be asked to light the match.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Copyright © Larry Peterson 2019

Giving thanks

UntitledIt’s a couple of days early, but the season is never wrong for giving thanks. I’ve seen a number of gratitude challenges online this year, and I think it’s a great trend.

Last year at this time, I had just returned from the CWG biennial writers retreat in DeWitt, Michigan. I am thankful that I’m still in touch with most of the people I met there. One has become a close friend in spite of the distance that separates us. Several have become my cheerleaders, and I hope my support buoys others from that special weekend. My life has been immeasurably enriched from that brief time and in getting to know my fellow retreatants/CWG members.

With the perspective of time, I am again reminded how powerful those few days were. I’ve attended other writing retreats along with numerous conferences, but putting our Lord and our Catholic faith at the center of the retreat was key to its uniqueness.

One of the themes that continues to come up in my monthly columns is that of connecting with other writers, whether it be critique based, genre based, special interest based, online, or in person. The Catholic Writers Guild is a great place for Catholic writers to connect. Opportunities abound. The Online Conference usually takes place in February; look for details as the time approaches. 2015’s Live Conference will be in Summit, New Jersey. Check out the website for critique groups. And if you’re not on the CWG Facebook page yet, email one of the officers for an invitation. While a writer’s life is solitary, find strength and encouragement in the fellowship of those who share the passion of the written word.

But most important, for us as Catholics, is the need to connect with God. Sometimes we need to take a step back from the pressures of writing and recall for Whom we write, and why we toil at this sometimes-thankless task. Enjoy your family this Thanksgiving. Work to alleviate hunger, poverty, and loneliness. Use your gifts for the glory of God. Avail yourself of the Sacraments. Spend time in prayer and Adoration.

May God bless the work of your hands, and may you enjoy the company of your fellow saints-in-making during this busy holiday season.